leeches dominant,
hauntings inevitable –
survival of the strongest,
destiny for the weak.
knowledge forgotten,
wisdom ignored –
revival of the worthy,
oblivion for the meek.
belong to nowhere,
beloved by none;
the leeches bite deep,
the hauntings consume.
go back to nowhere,
remembered by none;
the knowledge was false,
the wisdom begone.
i do not fear the fall –
i fear craving for it.
I am trapped in a room of idols,
And dead God knows how long I’ve been here.
Idols from the past, in all its glory,
Living a life no longer remembered.
Idols from the future, bathed in sunlight,
Those who can’t fathom the inevitable rain.
Idols from the now, scattered through worlds,
They only show their faces at noon.
I am trapped in dreams infinite,
In the land of sands not made by my oceans.
Idols from harsh words and idols from kindness,
Idols of pain and broken idols of prowess.
Their statues lay, in the loudest of silences,
Watching my every chained step towards nowhere.
I am trapped, since ever lost,
And dead God knows how long I’ve been here.
The angel sang my demise
like the melody of an old violin
and I’d feel honored, if not
for the unfairness of it all
Break your silence, child,
the angel said in kind words
thou shall be free of pain
thou shall be free of sorrow
But am I not also bound to be free
of my dreams and hopes
of the passion and lust
of all the beauty of my living despair?
Am I not also bound to be free
of the memories dear
of feeling the raindrops
of all the poetry this pain inflicts?
I will carry my soul, I answered
I shall keep my words spoken
I shall keep my heart broken
My spirit belongs to my void
And no one else.
The angel sang my demise
So be it, so be it
I have long watched the dance of the black swans
I have known the secrets of old
Doom never fails.
And so I became the raven
And I sang my own destiny, for those willing to listen
Be it demise, be it blessing,
Be it a curse of the eternal ones
My spirit belongs to my choice
And no one else.
(originally written in 17/12/2020)
darker the thoughts that run through my spirit
break me inside, tear me apart
shallow the feelings of hope and new days
they pull me and pull me in pieces asunder
onwards they run into scattered formation
in chaos they’re made, and will be reborn
they hunt through the maze, memories long broken
they howl in the night their untethered dismay
darker the thoughts that infect my being
my days and my nights belong still to them
shallow the feelings of brighter sun glory
lifeless remains of forgotten days
(originally written in 12/12/2020)
So I fly, far away,
through paths I haven’t dreamed of.
So I call you, loud and clear,
forgetting – I don’t know your name.
Long is my road, hungry my soul,
and I walk on the sands of lost kingdoms.
I have missed you, have I seen you?
I do indeed no longer feel.
And on dwell paths I cannot follow,
on go dangers I cannot face,
on your shadow brightly shines in my story,
born damned to be forgotten one day.
“I no longer hold pain”,
said the serpent
after the thousand deaths.
“But I do still carry wisdom”,
and my eyes brightened
by promises of hope.
“Follow the silver path,
and do not lose the vein;
thin is the thread unseen
that explains destiny at hand.
Follow the distant light,
but do not enter it –
its passage allows no memories,
and can only be crossed alone.
Follow heart and soul,
mind and thought,
bright and dark.
Seek the meaning of all things
but one.
And then, come back and tell them all.”
(the original date of writing was lost. circa 2018?)
She had always thought that guy to be strange. He was short in stature, and quite thin, and tended to walk with a bit of a hunch – even though he seemed to be quite young. But what really struck her as odd in him was the way he behaved when they met on the hallways. He would smile to her, and appeared to be a nice guy, even offering to help her with groceries. But he had an odd way to talk. He would stutter sometimes to say simple things like “How are you doing?” or “Good afternoon”, in weird, seemlingly involuntary pauses, and other times speaking so fast she had to take a couple of seconds to understand the words.
Even his hair sometimes had a weird reflection on it. It was a pitch black hair, that reflected blue when hit by light – she never really looked at it much, but now that she thought about it, that blue was of a weird tone. Sometimes going to greenish, it looked almost unnatural. Or was it really her memories playing tricks?
And the twitches. They were almost unnoticeable, but after a while seeing him around she started to see it. They were small, very fast, and random – sometimes his head, or hands, or a shoulder. He must have some kind of disorder, she always thought. Something subtle, but she was pretty sure she had seen an episode of some medical series with a case like that. But now… now she wondered.
With the events of yesterday, I can’t be sure of anything anymore, she thought to herself. Scratching her hair under the bandages, she questioned her memories of what happened for the twentieth time. Laying at the hospital bed for a whole day now, she couldn’t sleep, and couldn’t really stop thinking.
He was a really nice guy. He appeared to help so fast after her fall, and the first thing she remembered coming slightly into focus after the searing pain was his look of concern. But what she had seen… The head is a strange thing, the doctor had said. We can never know the effects after a knock like that. Our mind plays tricks. But she could swear – she could SWEAR – her vision went quite clear for a couple of minutes while waiting for the ambulance, and what she was seeing hadn’t changed.
The guy had freaking antennas, for god’s sake. His pitch black hair shone in strange colors. His eyes were odd in a way she couldn’t describe, and his limbs had weird protruding black things that made the whole arm look like a black saw. His hunch was bigger than ever and there seemed to be something in his back, althought she hadn’t seen it properly. While he talked to her, his weird speech and twitches seemed to be tuned up to twenty times the usual, and his voice sounded different. At those couple of minutes before being taken away, she was sure he had turned into something else. But how could he? The doctors talked to him while taking her to the ambulance. No one acted like had noticed anything strange about him at all. How could that be?
The thought of maybe going mad stirred her, and the involuntary twitch she had because of the sudden headache was almost ironic. She decided to lay down and try to sleep again, maybe hear some music.
Our mind plays tricks, indeed.
Sail into nothingness
oh, forgotten traveller
thy gods have long left this land.
Oh, but I shall sing
I shall sing into my fate
to the End days I shall come
and smile when I see the storms.
Sail into nothingness
oh, dead man breathing
thy gods no longer listen.
Oh, but I shall scream
I shall scream into my path
like a dream my thoughts become
I embrace my choices as they were.
© 2025 moonlight
Theme by Anders Norén — Up ↑